Dear Gangu

Gangu knows that he should never let his fame get to his head. Therefore Gangu has the strict policy of interacting with his fans. Gangu is one of you. He is one of “the guys”, some call him a “brotha”, others may even call him a homeboy. Gangu is your friend. He has strong shoulders to cry on... Basically everything that a lady needs. Gangu loves the interaction he gets on Facebook and Myspace, as well as the numerous emails Gangu receives. Gangu has decided that he will respond to his fan mail as well as answer some of the questions his fans might have. Here are a few letters Gangu has received over the past few days…

Dear Gangu,

I think my boyfriend is cheating on me. I catch him at the movies with another girl. Recently, he asked her out to the prom and bought her a gold ring (you know the kind that has your name on it). He also tells me he is too busy to hang out with me but I see him walking with “her” around my block as they hold hands. I usually wouldn’t think anything of it usually but yesterday I saw him with a hickie that I did not give him. When I asked him for a ride home, he put me in the back of his truck and let “her” ride up front. Do you think he is cheating on me? What should I do?

Sumi, Age 17, Tampa, FL

Dear Sumi,

I am sorry to tell you this, but Gangu has an inkling that this guy might be cheating on you! Gangu's brain is said to work faster than a computer! (A reputable source to confirm this is Gangu himself!) The movies, prom, ring, holding hands and walking, and even the hickie seemed like a normal situation to Gangu... Gangu can say this from experience... since many of Gangu's girls have done this to Gangu at one point or the other. But "riding in the back of the truck"... Oh my! That made Gangu smell a rat in this whole case. Gangu did what he usually does when he feels suspicious... he popped in the movie cassette "Gupt", and watched it three times. This got Gangu's brain going... When Gangu's girls usually got other guys into their cars... they would give Gangu the keys and tell him to drive and both of them would take the back seat. Clearly this was not the case here! They decided to sit in the front seat! As a result... Gangu has concluded... he is cheating on you! It is time you face reality and dump his Indian butt. Sumiii this guy doesn't seem to appreciate your beauty... but Gangu, on the other hand, appreciates women, and will always be here for you. If you feel too lonely some nights, feel free to hit up Gangu, my sweet pudding :-)

Dear Gangu,

I like a boy but do not know how to tell him that I like him. Well, actually, he isn’t really a boy…he is my math professor. While he talks about derivatives and integrals, all I can think about is his slightly overweight body and sexy bald spot. It is getting harder and harder to concentrate. Since I know that you are a ladies man, I thought you might know what I should do.

Anisha, Age 21, Albany, NY

Dear Anisha,

Oh my! Gangu's heart almost skipped a heartbeat! Gangu never made a distinction between the opposite sex... It doesn't make a difference to Gangu if the woman he looks at is a 22 yr old Miss Universe Model... or a 45 yr old mother of 12 kids! A woman is a woman! Similarly, Anisha, the rules of the game remain the same no matter which guy you like! You must let him know you like him... Personally, Gangu would prefer staying after class for some "extra help" (wink wink) Or maybe... Volunteering to calculate and optimize the surface area of his sexy bald spot, in class... This will surely impress him... Sooner or later, your math professor will realize how you feel about him and in response you will get a positive result! Gangu guarantees it! :-)

Dear Gangu,
After reading your magazine, Sexiest People Alive, the one that you are the sole publisher/editor, and writer for... and seeing your photo in it once again, I am wondering what kind of girl does Gangu look for?

Ami, Age 20, Salt Lake City, Utah

Dear Ami,

Gangu is glad to hear that Ami takes an interest in the kind of girls Gangu seeks. It is quite simple Ami; Gangu seeks all types of women. It doesn’t matter if they are skinny, fat, dark, light or even Pakistani. Gangu is an equal opportunity partner for everyone... and shows no bias in his women. Some might say Gangu is desperate!

If you have any questions that you would like Gangu to answer, feel free to email me at fobdaddy@gmail.com. Make sure it is an important question however, for Gmail only offers Gangu 3 Gigs of space which usually runs out once a day :) Also, Gangu can be IMed at his aim sname: gangupatel